We have discussed so much about the success in my earlier blogs. My followers asked a question \u201cWhat is the first step we should take to start our successful journey\u201d? The answer is \u201cSMART goal setting\u201d. Some of my clients asked me that besides of setting SMART goals in their life, they are unable to achieve them. Do you know what stops us to be successful in achieving our goals?? We!. Yes, we are the one who stops us to achieve our goals.
\nJack Canfield is the America\u2019s #1 Success Coach. He is the founder of the billion-dollar book brand Chicken Soup for the Soul\u00ae and a leading authority on Peak Performance and Life Success. While reading one of his bestselling book \u201cThe Success\u201d I, found a solution for the question \u201cWhat stops us to be successful\u201d? And I, would like to share with all of you. Jack wrote that,
\nIf you want to create the life of your dreams, then you are going to have to take 100% responsibility for your life as well. That means giving up all your excuses, all your victim stories, all the reasons why you can\u2019t and why you haven\u2019t up until now, and all your blaming of outside circumstances. You have to give them all up forever.
\nYou have to take the position that you have always had the power to make it different, to get it right, and to produce the desired result. For whatever reason\u2014ignorance, lack of awareness, fear, need to be right, the need to feel safe\u2014you chose not to exercise that power. Who knows why? It doesn\u2019t matter. The past is the past. All that matters now is that from this point forward you choose\u2014that\u2019s right, it\u2019s a choice\u2014to act as if you are 100% responsible for everything that does or doesn\u2019t happen to you.
\nIf something doesn\u2019t turn out as planned, you will ask yourself, how did I create that? What was I thinking? What were my beliefs? What did I say or not say? What did I do or not do to create that result? How did I get the other person to act that way? What do I need to do differently next time to get the result I want? ,
\nJack wrote that, Dr. Robert Resnick, a psychotherapist in Los Angeles, taught me a very simple but very important formula that made this idea of 100% responsibility even clearer to me. The formula is:
\nE + R = O (Event + Response = Outcome)
\nThe basic idea is that every outcome you experience in life (whether it is success or failure, wealth or poverty, health or illness, intimacy or estrangement, joy or frustration) is the result of how you have responded to an earlier event or events in your life. If you don\u2019t like the outcomes you are currently getting, there are two basic choices you can make.<\/p>\n
1. You can blame the event (E) for your lack of results (O). In other words, you can blame the economy, the weather, the lack of money, your lack of education, racism, gender bias, Government, your parents, your wife or husband, your boss\u2019s attitude, your employees, the system or lack of systems, and so on. If you\u2019re a golfer, you\u2019ve probably even blamed your clubs and the course you played on. No doubt all these factors do exist, but if they were the deciding factor, nobody would ever succeed.
\nJackie Robinson would never have played major league baseball, Barack Obama would never have become president of the United States, Sidney Poitier, and Denzel Washington would never have become movie stars, Dianne Feinstein and Barbara Boxer would never have become U.S. senators, Bill Gates would never have founded Microsoft, and Steve Jobs would never have started Apple Computers. For every reason why it\u2019s not possible, there are hundreds of people who have faced the same circumstances and succeeded.
\nLots of people overcome these so-called limiting factors, so it can\u2019t be the limiting factors that limit you. It is not the external conditions and circumstances that stop you\u2014it is you! We stop ourselves! We think limited thoughts and engage self-defeating behaviors. We defend our self-destructive habits (such as drinking, smoking, and not getting enough sleep) with indefensible logic. We ignore useful feedback, fail to continuously educate ourselves and learn new skills, waste time on the trivial aspects of our lives, engage in idle gossip, eat unhealthy food, fail to exercise, spend more money than we make, fail to invest in our future, avoid necessary conflict, fail to tell the uncomfortable truth, don\u2019t ask for what we want\u2014and then wonder why our lives don\u2019t work.<\/p>\n
2. You can instead simply change your responses (R) to the events (E)\u2014the way things are\u2014until you get the outcomes (O) you want. You can change your thinking, change your communication, change the pictures you hold in your head (your images of yourself and the world), and change your behavior\u2014the things you do. That is all you really have any control over anyway. Unfortunately, most of us are so run by our habits that we never change our behavior. We get stuck in our conditioned responses\u2014to our spouses and our children, to our colleagues at work, to our customers and our clients, to our students, and to the world at large. We are a bundle of conditioned reflexes that operate outside of our control. You have to regain control of your thoughts, your images, your dreams and daydreams, and your behavior. Everything you think, say, and do need to become intentional and aligned with your purpose, your values, and your goals.
\nHence the events happen with us are un-controllable. We cannot change them but what we can do? We can response wisely to get the desired outcomes. And If we don\u2019t know how to response in specific situation; learn the skill or talk to any expert.<\/p>\n
Stay blessed!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
We have discussed so much about the success in my earlier blogs. My followers asked a question \u201cWhat is the first step we should take to start our successful journey\u201d? The answer is \u201cSMART goal setting\u201d. Some of my clients asked me that besides of setting SMART goals in their life, they are unable to…
Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":40,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/rakhshandasyed.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1098"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/rakhshandasyed.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/rakhshandasyed.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rakhshandasyed.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rakhshandasyed.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1098"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/rakhshandasyed.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1098\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1099,"href":"http:\/\/rakhshandasyed.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1098\/revisions\/1099"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/rakhshandasyed.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/40"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/rakhshandasyed.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1098"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}